Life Lessons from Anbe Sivam

 

In terms of Anbe Sivam, we're late learners. But better late than never. 
This cult classic offers: 
Timeless lessons - designed to make ourselves and the world... BETTER.

1. Self-acceptance. 

The mirror scenes have a beautiful dichotomy of  Nallasivam (Kamal Hassan) subsequently accepting himself - even vanity:

• He is dejected when he sees his scarred face in the hospital.
• He calls himself handsome when he sees himself in the mirror at the hotel.

Life lesson from here:

• You needn't meet beauty standards.
• Self acceptance is valid no matter how you look.
• People will accept you when you accept yourself.

2. Learn to listen actively.

No one actually listens actively anymore: including me.😅

Listening is food for the mind.

In the case of A. Anbarasu (R. Madhavan), listening would've saved him from an embarrassing injury. 😂

3. Humor diffuses distress.

In the entire movie, the most stressful situations are handled with clever humor.

• Nallasivam jokes about his disability.
• As a wheelchair user, I do it too.
• Self-deprecating jokes are a sign of high-level self acceptance.

4. Do not try to control the world - just embrace it.

Innocent idiosyncrasies of people in public don't deserve beef.
This doesn't mean tolerating lack of facilities, public decency, and accessibility.

This means accepting people as they come - diversity.

5. Women can drive men.

Meherunissa is defiant. 

And she doesn't hesitate to call out the prevailing sexism when Nalla says he'll drive the bike.

Fact:

• Women are pedantic, efficient drivers compared to men.
• This, despite vehicles not designed to support women's physiology.
• Go on. Do your research.

6. Love is complicated - but moving on is essential.

This scene is one of the most hilarious yet realistic love proposal scenes.

• Meher accuses Nalla of being a typical man: falling for a woman's beauty, not personality and capability.
• Meher asserts that she's a brave woman; so, she wouldn't do anything stupid due to love failure.

None of them are vengeful over love failure.

And stressing that physical match (short men) isn't a criteria for love is a necessary reminder.

7. Religious people aren't necessarily good people.

Religiosity isn't the equivalent of goodness.

Morality is inherent, not religion-induced.

Many accuse that the movie deliberately made Hindus look bad while elevating Christianity.

I'll explain:

• The name of the movie has a Hindu deity's name - Sivam.
• And love: Anbu.
• When Ars, who believes in God says: "I don't like Anbu," referring to his full name...
• Sivam, who's an atheist, insists that Anbu is important.

 

The movie is named after 2 of the lead characters: Anbe Sivam.

• Anbe: A. Anbarasu
• Sivam: Nallasivam

If only we put aside religious sensitivity and pride... we'd understand that everyone who is selfless is the epitome of love... and God lives in them.

It doesn't matter which religion you belong to.

That's the lesson. 

And it applies universally: the POV of atheists who believe that God lives in our deeds.

8. Dignity. Strength. Resilience.

Nalla survives the accident despite Kandasamy Padayachi's (Nassar) ill will.

He doesn't accept Padayachi's offer of money in exchange for no contact with his daughter, Balasaraswathi (Kiran Rathod). 

It takes a lot to survive such a tragedy and face the person who wished for your death.

9. Make yourself with what life offers you.

When Nalla takes the dog (Saniyan/Sanggu) with him, it hit me that:

Companionship comes in all kinds of forms.

You need to look hard enough and accept that fact.

Conclusion

Anbe Sivam is a masterpiece that is untouchable. 

It's a movie I always go back to when I need to restore faith in myself and humanity.