A Believer in Science and Herself, not in God and Religion

Disclaimer: 

I am only expressing my thoughts on this blog. I am neither imposing anyone to follow my atheism nor ordering anyone to stop believing in whatever they want to believe. You don't have any fucking right to invalidate my thoughts and impose your religiosity on me in the name of commenting. There are thousands of religious faith belief based blogs - go and croak there.

I had written in my high school autograph that God is one of my favourite things. I would like to go back in time and slap myself silly for being such a dork.😂😂

My atheism kicked in as my rare genetic illness’ (Wilson’s Disease, a copper metabolism-related disease) symptoms kicked in. It is not driven by anger coz of this disease’s debilitating manifestation or the question of “Why me?” It is driven by logical thinking and rationalism that built upon themselves gradually.👧👧

At the onset of my illness, divine intervention was the first choice for my family to cure me. It was in accordance with the Hindu faith. I was diagnosed as possessed,👻 a victim of black magic, and even that I was faking it by the proponents of this faith.

Trigger warning: The content in the red font can be distressing. Reader discretion is advised.

A black feathered happy hen was slaughtered by a priest by biting on her neck and her head twisted and yanked off as I was forced to watch. The hen’s bloodied head was then smeared on my face. Apparently, it is so that the spirit that possessed me, leave my body.

I was whipped by a whiplash (no, not 50 Shades of Grey kind of thing) by a temple priest; it was an exorcising ritual. It was claimed that the evil spirit in me will feel the blows and that I won’t feel a thing. But I felt each and every flog. I was also made to walk wearing nails studded slippers – if you want to try this in BDSM, do it at your own risk.

I had voodoo-like things done. I was accused of jilting a boy’s advances by spitting on him and that he had done black magic on me for vengeance. I never spit in public, what more spitting on someone. I was a schoolgirl who was either in school or at home with a book always in my hand. I even take books to my hospital appointments and study as I wait for my turn to see the doctor. I explained to the priest that this is my routine and he got angry.💦

I was also taken to Chinese sinsehs. And they diagnosed me with ‘heatiness’. Watch Jason Leong explaining this ‘heatiness’ diagnosis.

Of course, it was ‘no money, no curing ritual’. My family spent almost RM 3K on all these rituals. Yet, I didn’t get better – I got worse. By then, I had put my leg down and went “Haiya,” before Uncle Roger made it a trend.

Then, we fell back to modern medicine with my maternal uncle and my third half sister’s husband’s intervention.

Owing to the paucity of my disease, the correct diagnosis was elusive. The doctors were honest about it. Although I was misdiagnosed with depression and schizophrenia, I was still admitted and got blood works, ECG, CT scans, and MRI done. Finally, the correct diagnosis was made by Malaysia’s leading neurologist, Dr Chew from UHKL. Treatment began and I was in and out of hospitals for 5 years.

In my case, science didn’t pretend like it knew all the answers. My case got a lot of referrals and I saw Dr Chew taking out a medical journal and matching my symptoms with the details in the book. He talked to me for more than 2 hours, examined my symptoms, made the prognosis, and started the treatment.💪

Those religious people and religions act like they have all the answers when they don’t.💩 Even after witnessing how science saved me, some of my family members disdain science coz “Science says one thing today and another tomorrow.” That’s because science is brave and humble enough to say, “I don’t know but I am going to find out.” Science corrects itself as new discoveries are made. Science evolves as new inventions are created.

Wilson’s Disease was named after the American-born British neurologist, Dr. Samuel Alexander Kinnier Wilson who, in 1912, composed his doctoral thesis on the pathologic findings of "lenticular degeneration" in the brain associated with cirrhosis of the liver. Before 1912, anyone with this disease is left with a certain death sentence caused by copper toxicity. In 2019, we did not have a vaccine for coronavirus. HIV can now be managed by antiretroviral drugs – many HIV positive people get married, have HIV negative kids and are healthier than HIV negative people nowadays.

Science develops itself while religions stay stagnant. After snubbing science, religious people call their taboos and rituals ‘scientific’. This is pernicious.

When I go to the hospital for my medical check-ups, I always get people coming up to me recommending this temple and that divine healing practitioner – if those temples and practitioners work, what are you doing in the hospital, waiting for your turn to see the doctor? I used to question my staunchly Hindu family members but I am called stupid for asking too many questions and not believing implicitly. Sorry, I refuse to have blind beliefs. I have stopped questioning them since coz familial ties are involved.

My mom often watches superstitious nonsense on the telly and tells me about it. Yesterday, she said some drivel by a Vaasthu Sashtra (Hindu feng shui) practitioner that a house must always have no dearth of salt and water for prosperity and longevity to manifest and that if he is successful, it is because of that only.

So, I asked her to trade our furniture, jewels, and clothes for salt and asked her,  “Right now, there is water up to the roof level at the Malaysian east coast that has seen deaths – how prosperous and long-living they are?”👺

I also asked her that for Vaashtu Sashtra, tortoises are considered inauspicious and bad luck bringers but for the Chinese, tortoises are believed to bring wealth and luck.🐢 She was like, “It’s different beliefs. Tortoises work positively for the Chinese and negatively for us.”😤 So, I asked her, “Then coronavirus vaccine will work differently for the Chinese and differently for us?”😂 She accused me of starting a fight coz she has no answer.

All these beliefs, feng shui, and religious rituals do not contribute to one’s corporeal success. Only hard work, initiative, and self-confidence bring success. If I just concentrate on having salt and water in my home, how will I run the household? I haven’t gone to my home’s prayers room for years and I haven’t prayed for ages. I am actually living better now that I had renounced my religious faith. I am doing productive things and I only believe in myself, not in divinity.

Don't ask a better life from God by bribing it with prayers and stuff. Create a better life by yourself, for yourself, and for others.