Dark Skinned Tamil Men in Tamil Movies have No Self-Respect

Dark skin color shaming of the lead male actors in Tamil movies have a bloody-minded format that's celebrated for all the wrong reasons.

Scene: Fair skinned, non-Tamil heroine rejects the dark skinned Tamil hero in Tamil movies. 💅😈

Expectation: The dark skinned hero moves on, becoming more open to dark skinned women and ceasing white worshiping. 💪💀

Reality: The dark skinned hero/his sidekick talks highly about dark skin and then pursues the fair skinned, non-Tamil heroine who rejected him until she gives in. Or the hero, who's sidekick just glorified dark skin color as Dravidian stock's true color, vows to become fair skinned. 💢💩💦😓😡😤😩😒

This is me when I see such scenes. Apoplectic. 

I need to ask... "Vekkamave illaiya? Maanam, rosham, soodu, soranai lam illaya?" I speak Tamil in a good flow when pissed.

Mocking one's skin color is body shaming. If a guy rejects me for my skin color, my crooked nose, lip curve, sagging breasts, or whatever, no matter how impressed by him, my self-respect would make me not want to do anything with him. But Tamil movie heroes somehow don't have that basic sense. They want that Petromax light only.

I've spoken to dark skinned Tamil men who were mocked and rejected by fair skinned women/body shamed. Their response to that is the cultivation of an ambition to marry a fair skinned girl. I don't understand...

In that process of finding a fair skinned wife because fair skinned women rejected them, dark skinned Indian men do the following:

1. Perpetuate the stereotype that dark boy and fair girl makes the best pair.

2. Dark skinned men thinking they have the right to mock/outrightly reject dark skinned women.

3. Dark skin is attractive when it's on men and unattractive when on women.

4. Continue the trend of casting fair skinned non Tamil women in Tamil movies.

I can understand the dilemma and frustration. Despite having so many iconic representation of dark skinned Tamil men on screen, the average dark skinned Tamil man still go through shaming because of their skin color. I needn't go far - my mom wishes her grandsons were fair skinned - since they are dark skinned, she tells them to study well and get a good job so they can marry fair skinned women.

I always tell my mom to put a hold on poisoning my nephews' minds. I don't want those boys to succumb to this Indian society's discriminatory rules. If they marry, they're gonna marry for love, not fair skin. Their life partners should marry the boys for love, not adjusting with the boys' dark skin tone for their money.

What I want for my nephews, I want for every dark skinned Tamil man.

If you're shamed for not being of a certain skin tone, the right thing to do is embrace it and embrace people who look like you. Form a solidarity and date people of your skin color - I mean, don't exclude diversity in dating but don't filter out dark skinned people. 

I am in all-women's groups where we form a sisterhood, discussing discrimination we experience - including skin color discrimination. And we don't pledge to marry a fair skinned man because our dark skin had been mocked by men. 

Discrimination cannot be eliminated by favoring what's considered superior in terms of finding a life partner. Discrimination can only be eliminated when you don't kick those discriminated like you to the curb and consider them as deserving of equality as you are.